Sincerely, Rosy
by Troublesome Writer
Summary: A doctor in reality. A sexpert in virtual reality. Haruno Sakura posts her sexcapades and gives advice on sex on her online blog using the pseudonym Rosy. Meanwhile, after years of absence, an old, important childhood friend returns and brings along scarring memories. Alternate Universe. SasuSaku. WARNING: FREQUENT PROFANITY AND EXPLICIT CONTENT.
1. Dear Rosy,

_Ssssssssssssssssss. Flush._

_. . ._

_. . ._

. . .

"Come on, goddamn it."

. . .

. . .

. . .

"YES! FUCK. God. Oh my FUCK thank god. That was almost really fucking terrible. Hey Ino! Guess what! I'm not pregnant! Wooooo!"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY? I'M IN THE SHOWER!"

"I SAID I'M NOT PREGNANT YOU DEAF BITCH!"

"HEY FUCK YOU! I AM A LOVELY LADY, YOU FUCKING WHORE! LET'S CELEBRATE BY GETTING DRUNK OFF OUR ASSES!"

"HELL YEA! NOW HURRY THE FUCK UP!"

* * *

Hello, my name is Haruno Sakura. I'm 26 years old and have recently earned my M.D. and am now starting my residency at the Hikari Hospital in Konoha. As you may have noticed, I can be somewhat boisterous. Some even say whimsical. Others, downright vulgar. But before you call me anything, let me show you around.

See that girl right there whom I screamed at across the apartment? The blonde putting lipstick on and puckering at her reflection like a goddamn fish. That's Ino Yamanaka, my roommate and my best friend. I love her to death. She's honest, generous, respectful, and pays half the rent like a true friend.

"INO! DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO MY RED PUMPS?"

"THEY'RE MINE NOW YA EVIL BITCH!"

"GODDAMN IT, INO!"

Yep, a true friend. Right now Ino is working as a waitress at Kai's Sushi Bistro while aspiring to be an actress. Believe it or not, we weren't always this close. Since elementary school, we had always bickered and never got along. Once we were in high school, though, something just clicked and we became best friends. Then after graduation, I went to college and Ino left to travel the world. And now we're roommates. Cute, right? We have other friends too like Naruto, Hinata, Shikamaru and a couple others but I'll tell you about them later.

Now, you're probably wondering about the pregnancy thing. Well, I'm not quite sure where to start. See, a couple of weeks ago I felt kind of depressed and unattractive and decided to feel better with a couple of drinks at my usual bar. Really bad idea. Somehow my first drink escalated to me waking up naked in a bed that was not mine and next to a man that I did not know - who was also naked. So there you have it, that's my sad little story. Unfortunately, I have to wait 2 more months to test for any STD's. I am so fucking STOKED.

_Boodadoop!_

Sweet! A notification! I can't believe I almost forgot to mention it. Give me one sec.

* * *

**Dear Rosy,**

**I've been having trouble giving my boyfriend good handjobs. He says he likes it but I know he's just being nice. I'm not that experienced so when I do it I feel like I'm hurting him or - I don't know - something just doesn't feel right. Got any tips?**

**Sincerely,**

**Tight Grip**

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**Dear Tight Grip,**

**Try giving him a blowjob first or licking/spitting on your hand before giving him a handjob. Or you can use lube or lotion instead. It should feel really good for him and also not feel as awkward for you when you do it. Try to avoid giving handjobs without some kind of lubrication. You could tear his skin and cause it to scab and that would be a real mood ruiner. You can use both hands or just one, it's all up to preference (that goes for speed and grip too). And remember, a lot of the sensation comes from the top of the penis, but that does not mean you should ignore the rest! If you'd like more specific tips or instructions, feel free to PM me. Hope this helps!**

**Sincerely,**

**Rosy**

* * *

Yea, I run a sex advice blog. So what? And yes, Rosy is my pen name. . . Shut the fuck up.


	2. Cordially,

_"Just close your eyes and let me do everything."_

I woke up with cold sweat on my forehead and hot tears in my eyes. _What the hell? What did I dream about?_ I glanced over to my alarm clock on my dresser. It's almost 4am. _Gotta wake up in 3 hours. . . perfect._ I wobbled to the bathroom, rinsed my face, and I looked at myself. A pale face with slightly red eyes stared back. _God,__ I look so pitiful. _I dried my face off and I wobbled back to bed.

* * *

"SAKURA!" hollered the great, blonde beast.

"Yes, Tsunade?"

"Did you remember to check on Kai like I asked?" she asked in a routine-like tone.

"In the CCU? Yes, everything looks fine now."

"How is he? Have you talked to him yet?" she asked with more seriousness.

"No, not really. I've talked to his family, though, and they were all pretty worked up about it. His wife never even knew of his family's history of heart attacks."

"I see. Well don't forget to look after him during the next few days, and make sure he is taking his drugs. I'll be back later to see how you're doing so get back to work," she ordered.

Tsunade is the chief physician at this hospital and since I've been here, she's been oddly attentive towards me. Before I met her, I read some of the research she's done and I thought she was remarkable. The day I met her, though, she was not as eloquent as I pictured. She is a short-tempered, freakishly strong, alcoholic woman who always thinks she's right. But I really respect her and I'm learning a lot from her. She helped me get through my days as an intern and really pushed me to do my best. She's one of the reasons I wanted to work at this hospital.

* * *

_Finally - HOME!_

Struggling, I climbed up the treacherous steps, cursing as I took each step, to my welcoming apartment on the third floor.

"Fuck. Fucking. Fuck. Fuck these fucking stairs. Thank god I get a day off tomorrow."

I unlocked and opened my door, traveled to my room, and let gravity pull me to my trustworthy bed. And then I noticed my computer screen. The aquarium screensaver glowing like the whining of a puppy begging for attention from its returning owner. I got to my computer, checked all of my social network accounts and my email and then lastly, I got to my blog.

Today I received 63 notifications. It seems like a good amount of sex questions, but after doing this for more than year now, I know that most of these are just crude comments and/or creepy requests for nude pictures of me or videos of me masturbating. And of course, there are the questions like, "I like butt sex. Do you like butt sex?" which never cease to annoy me.

I have 10 genuine questions. I decided to just answer one tonight and the rest tomorrow.

* * *

**Hey Rosy,**_  
_

**Does frequent masturbation of the clitoris desensitize it? I heard that after some time, a girl who masturbates a lot will be unable to have an orgasm during sex. Is this true? And if it is, is there a way to fix that?**

**Anonymous**

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**Dear Anonymous,**

**The inability of achieving an orgasm during sex due to desensitization or numbness of the clitoris from masturbation is false. Masturbation actually helps increase the sensitivity of the clitoris and the sensations of orgasms, whether or not you use a toy. So unless you're starting to injure yourself, there's no such thing as too much masturbation! Many women masturbate regularly and discover what feels good for them while also relieving stress and learning about their bodies. So don't fret! Masturbate to your heart's and clitoris's content! If you'd like to continue discussing more about masturbation, feel free to PM me! Hope this helps!**

**Sincerely,**

**Rosy**

* * *

The next day I woke up just as angelic and perfect as I always do when I wake up at 2pm. Ino and I are meeting Naruto at Ichiraku for lunch before Ino's dinner shift. I have to go wake her up before we're both late. God, she's scary when she wake up.

An hour later we are walking towards Ichiraku. Ino's talking to me about the latest gossip on Tenten and Neji and also complaining about her boyfriend Shikamaru. As we near the restaurant, we see Naruto's spiky hair and hear his loud overly hyper voice. He seems to be talking to someone next to him who looks strangely familiar and kind of attractive.

"Oh my god," I uttered.

"SASUKE! OH MY GOD YOU'RE BACK!" shouted Ino who dashed toward the infamous Sasuke Uchiha and welcoming him with a non-optional hug.

I sat down next to Naruto while Ino sat next to Sasuke and was excitedly asking every "How have you been?", "Why are you back?", and "What have you been up to?" Naruto was just as enthusiastic about Sasuke's return.

Uninterested, I ordered my ramen and coolly shifted my attention to my phone. I took a good look at him while he was answering one of Naruto's questions. _Goddamnit, he's really hot. _The whole time Ino and Naruto were still enticed by Sasuke's presence while I remained quiet, occasionally laughing or commenting on Ino or Naruto's remarks.

"Oh shit! Sorry guys, I gotta go to work! Nice to see you again Sasuke, let's catch up some time! Bye guys!" Ino said cheerfully as she scurried off to her waitressing duties.

"I gotta go too. Gotta meet Hinata at the movies. Later!" Naruto said as he abandoned me.

And then there were two.

A short silence came between us and unfortunately, all I could do was drink my water and sip my lukewarm miso broth to ease the awkwardness.

"Well I think I'll be going too," I said after looking at my phone and avoiding eye contact.

"Where are you going?" Sasuke asked with an admittedly cool tone.

"Back to my apartment."

"Oh."

"Yep."

Another short awkward silence passed through us as we both paid our checks.

"Can I come?" Sasuke asked in a surprisingly genuine tone.

"Uhh, I don't know, it's kind of messy and there's not a lot to do there," I said, taken aback.

"I don't care. I missed you."

And despite all the years that have passed, at that moment his eyes twinkled in a way that signaled to me, "Nothing has changed." Maybe it wasn't actually there and I'm just being overly romantic, but it felt like we were both the same childish 12-year olds we used to be before he left.

"Uhm, Ok. Yea sure, let's go," I said with a flustered expression. I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks and I inwardly cursed at myself for falling for something like that._  
_

The walk to my apartment wasn't so awkward. Neither of us had much to say and I had a reliable feeling he preferred walking in silence. We arrived at my apartment and as soon as we walked in I dropped my stuff and plopped on the couch. Sasuke just stood by the door, looking around like he was in another dimension.

"You're allowed to sit down, you know. Here, I'll go get us some drinks and you can sit here. What do you like?" I struggled to get up from my abysmal couch and went into the kitchen, fetched two glasses, and looked through my collection of booze.

"No thanks."

I poured some red wine into the glasses and delivered them to the coffee table in front of the couch.

"I got wine for you in case you changed your mind," I said as I set his glass down and sat next to him.

Our time together started out kind of quiet. Not awkward or boring, just quiet. But as the minutes tiptoed past us, Sasuke gave in to drinking his wine and loosened up a little. It was only a little, but it was enough to get him to open up some. It was surprising how long we talked for. We talked about our experiences in school, our partying, our careers, our families, and our love lives. I did more of the talking, though. Still, I was having a great time catching up with someone who used to be so important to me. But in spite of this, I felt uncomfortable. His eyes were piercing. I felt insecure just having him pay attention to me. Yet at the same time, his stare made me want to embrace him. It was the strangest thing. And as I finished speaking my thoughts, those piercing eyes began to close and his presence enveloped me.

And he kissed me.


	3. Best Wishes,

Oh god. What have I done.

Hi, my name is Haruno Sakura. And I am the most desperate woman you will ever meet, even _after_ 14 years of zero communication. Here I am, bare naked in the arms of the also bare naked Uchiha Sasuke. I am such an idiot. But in my defense, who could resist those perfect abs? Let me eloquently explain exactly what happened:

_I melted from the warmth of his soft lips. A million things were spinning in my mind and I knew I should stop him before things escalated, but I succumbed._

_Our tongues dove deeper as we kissed and I let out a soft moan. He pulled my body close and I wrapped my arms around his neck, gripping the back of his shirt. We both pulled the shirts off each other's backs and hurriedly unbuttoned and slipped off each other's jeans. His heated body now on top of mine and my legs wrapped around his waist, he voraciously kissed my neck while he unhooked my bra._

_He kissed his way to my breasts and started sucking my nipples. He then roughly started fingering my wet pussy. I moaned loudly. My back arched and my legs shook as I begged for more. Without any hesitation he closed in on my body and knowing what was next, I whispered in the sexiest voice I could muster, "Do you have a condom?"_

_At that moment he looked at me with a surprised but agreeing expression and quickly retrieved a condom from his wallet. I longingly watched him slip it on his hard 8-inch cock and bit my lip. He took off my panties and got back over my body while I wrapped my legs back around his waist. He gave me a soft kiss and then, without warning, thrust into me. I let out a muffled moan and he quickened his pace. Our bodies began to sweat and I could feel every inch of his cock thrusting into me. He lowered his face next to mine, his hot breath on my neck, and he pulled my hair back. My body tensed up and I could feel myself about to cum. I whispered, "I'm getting close."_

_He whispered back, "Me too."_

_He thrust faster and harder and I could no longer hold back. I moaned, "I'm gonna cum!"_

_"Cum for me, Sakura," he whispered._

_ It felt so good that I couldn't help but moan, "Ohh, Sasuke!"_ _My body tensed and I dug my nails into his back as I felt the hot, pulsating sensation fill me. He slowed down and stopped and we both lied there, breathing heavily and sweating._

And now we're here, naked and satisfied. And a little ashamed. Without a word between us, we both got up and started getting dressed. When we were fully clothed, we just sat. avoiding eye contact.

"So, what did you think?" asked Sasuke.

"Oh- uhh, about what?" asked me, awkwardly.

"How did I do?"

"Oh, right! Yea, it was ok." _Why did I say that?__  
_

"Just ok?"

"No! I mean, it was good! Great! It was great. I liked the-uhh. I liked when you said that thing. That was cool - when you said that thing." _God, please let me stop.__  
_

"That thing?"

"Yea, you know, that thing! That you said while. . . well, you know! Never mind, fuck. I mean, not fuck. I mean, never mind! Anyway, how was it for you?"

"It was ok." _This asshole._

"Thanks," I said sarcastically.

"I liked it when I told you to cum. And then you did," he said with a smirk.

"Oh my god, don't say that! This is so weird, you're like my elementary school crush! This is so crazy!" I ran my fingers through my hair in disbelief.

"I didn't really expect it either," he said, seemingly amused by my reaction.

Sasuke stood up and walked around the apartment. He went in my room while I took a moment to compose myself. And then I ran to my room.

"Wait! Don't look at that, that's private." I frantically covered my computer screen in case I left my sex blog up.

"Don't worry, I didn't look at your porn." _This son of a bitch!_

"It's not porn!"

"Don't care."

I turned off my computer screen and looked back at Sasuke. He was looking at my family picture.

"You should come to my place tomorrow."

"What, really?" I said, genuinely surprised by his invitation.

"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want you to."

"Oh, well I don't know. I have to work tomorrow."

He was still looking at my family picture.

"Ok, some other time then. I should get going, thanks for the wine," he said as he started to make his way to the door.

"Oh it's no problem, it's just cheap gas station wine. Are you sure you don't wa-"

"SAKURAAA I'M HOOOME! WHERE'S MY DINNER?! I'M A WORKING WOMAN AND I- " While walking to my room, she stopped and stared puzzled at me and Sasuke.

"Sasuke? Oh sorry, did I interrupt something?"

"No, not at all. Sasuke was actually just about to leave, right?" I looked at him, waiting for him to agree to avoid any more awkward moments.

"Right. I'll see you later, Sakura. See you, Ino."

And a few footsteps later, he was gone.

"What **happened**?" Ino excitedly asked with her infamous gossip-hungry grin.

"Nothing! Nothing happened, we just talked! That's all. Now leave! I'm busy!" I yelled, flustered and unwilling to tell the biggest gossip in the world what just happened.

"Bullshit. Something happened, there's empty wine glasses on the table! Did you guys fuck?" Her eyes widened and her mouth gaped at the possibility.

"**No!** And what does wine have to do with it? I have wine with you, doesn't mean that we fuck! Now get out!"

"Ok, ok, just asking. Since when did you get so shy?" Ino said in her coy tone.

I closed the door as she walked away and mumbled something about ordering pizza. I plopped on my bed, assessing everything that happened. I felt a little bad for giving in so easily. I knew this guy since we were kids, but I don't actually know him well at all. Even so, I can't help but replay everything that happened and think how **sexy** he is. I mean, I've had hookups before but _goddamn_ that was hot. But that was just a one-time thing. I'm not about to be someone's booty call, not even Sasuke's.

When I hurriedly hid my computer screen from Sasuke's vision, I noticed I had some notifications. I walked over to my computer and I stumbled upon an interesting message.

* * *

**Dear Rosy,**

**This isn't really a question about sex, but I was hoping you could help me. I'm in a friends-with-benefits relationship with my best friend. It's been going on for a few weeks now, and I've been in love with him for a while. He doesn't know. Some of my friends say I should tell him and that he probably likes me back but my other friends say he's using me. I don't think he's using me because he's really sweet and a good person and I trust him. But I'm not sure if he loves me back because if he did, then why does he still treat me as his friend? I've been waiting and I think I've been pretty clear about my feelings. I was so happy when I first did it with him and I thought it meant we would be more than friends. Sorry that I'm venting. I just don't know what to do. I like what we have but I can't help but want more than just sex.**

**From,**

**A friend**

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**Dear Friend,**

**Don't be sorry, we've all been there before. Sex is amazing and feels great and makes beautiful babies. But the truth is, sex isn't always enough. I don't know you or your friend or the situation, so I can't really say if he's using you or he's just waiting for the right moment to sweep you off your feet. My advice to you, dear friend, is to be decisive, know what you want, and never discard your self-respect. Sex is not something to take lightly and can either build you up or break you down. Find out what he wants out of the relationship. I know this might sound intimidating, but if what he wants doesn't align with what you want, that's your cue to end the cycle. And the sooner the better. That way if things don't work out at least you can preserve the friendship (not to say your friendship is inevitably going to end if you confront him). This is a tricky situation and I wish it was as simple as me telling you a sex tip. If you find yourself wanting more advice or just support, you can PM me and I'll do the best I can to help. I wish you all the best!**

**Sincerely,**

**Rosy**

* * *

That post stuck with me for the rest of the evening. It brought back all my old crushes, my sex stories, and my past boyfriends. To be honest, I really had no idea what to say. I've never been in love. I thought I was when I was 16, but only for a month so I don't think that counts. That being said, I hope my advice helps.

I decided to go on a walk. The air felt cool and crisp and the retreating sunset left the sky a dark blue with faint twinkling from the stars. People usually go on these nightly strolls to clear their minds or ruminate on something in their lives or have some sort of epiphany. I, on the other hand, found myself not thinking about anything at all. I felt unusually spiritual. But I also felt a little hollow.

About half an hour later, I ended up in front of a small apartment complex. I spotted a silhouette in the window. The light from the apartment revealed a part of the person's face and I recognized him. It's Sasuke. Feeling impulsive and brash and spontaneous and little insane, I rushed to his door and I knocked purposefully. He opened the door and before he could say my name, before he could even finish feeling surprised, I kissed him and I closed the door.

I don't know what went through my mind. I think I want to fall in love. I think I want to know how it feels to have my heart broken. And I have a feeling that Sasuke's just the guy who can do that for me.


End file.
